Saturday, May 12, 2007

33w2d & Hospital Bedrest Day 25

Still hangin' in there and really looking forward to reaching the 34 week mark. Then, all eyes will be set on 36!

Got scanned yesterday morning, and I am grateful for another good report:

Fluid on baby A is pretty much unchanged with an index 6.0 (deepest vertical pocket of 3.25). Still considered too low, and why I remain in da slammer. For sake of comparison, the other baby's fluid index was 10, which is normal.

My cervix remains completely closed & thick and measuring over 3.0 (it's curved a bit) - no beaking even though baby A's head is right down there resting on it. when she gets the hiccups I can feel it in my cervix! Weird. I think tomorrow that instead of Mother's Day, we will celebrate Cervix Day.

So... onward! I am feeling huger than ever, and contractions are getting stronger when they happen. Right now I feel in a bit of weird limbo where it's almost time to begin thinking about the fact that these babies are gonna be here soon... but part of me doesn't want to think about that too much or in too much detail because I so badly want them to stay in longer.

Bedrest, and especially in hospital, can be challenging. I know many people have done this longer than me, and with far more complications, and so I am trying to be stalwart about it. Most of the time I am ok and the days/weeks actually go along at a pretty good pace. But there are other times when it all feels so surreal and I kinda can't believe I'm here.

I do have the sense that later on, this time will be a mere blip and there will be plenty of other things going on in life! Sometimes my fears about becoming a parent, and the added challenge of two babies at once, rise and make me feel quite scared. Especially with the extra time to think. But something has happened to me while I've been here: I realize that I can handle this. Have been doing so for about a month now. And with a fairly good measure of resiliance. I need to lose my surprise at that fact and own it. I also need to entertain the idea that I may actually adjust into the challenges of twin parenthood better than I've been expecting. I know it will be hard, but at least I need to allow for the possibility that it might be easier (or at least more fun...) than I've scared myself into anticipating.

8 comments:

Bea said...

33w2d and counting - this sounds good good good. I think you'll handle the rest, too.

Bea

Eva said...

Happy mother's day!

When I was pregnant someone told me it's easier to anticipate the hard part than the joy... that was definitely true for me. I think it's much easier to be this way than to be someone expecting Hallmark motherhood and being shocked by the work. So, if you're ready for the work, you will be pleasantly surprised by the great joy. how wonderful you can literally count the days now.

Mel said...

Hoping that the little buns stay in their cozy oven for serval more weeks, or months even!

Happy Mother's Day!

singletracey said...

yeah.. you have made it another week! The babies are doing well... you are doing well.. what more could one ask :-)

Hope you enjoyed your "cervix day"!!

Have a great week :-)

jennifer said...

Your Baby A and my Baby A are oing the same thing. All tucked down right on the cervix and hiccuping! I can't beleive how long you have been on bedrest. I had a friend on hospital bed rest for two and a half weeks and that was really tough. And you are bed resting for much longer! I especially like your last paragraph...it echoes some of the fears/concerns in my own head. Two babies will be a challenge no doubt. I get really scared sometimes. But look at how remarkably you have been handling it all so far.

You'll make it to 36 weeks. You are so close!!

Lut C. said...

I'm glad you got another good report. You sound like you're coping well with the situation.

Once the bedrest is all over, it will seem like a blip.
Going through it must be a challenge. I think the extra time to think would the hardest for me as well. How many books can one read on end? How many television can one watch for distraction?

Beagle said...

Keep your eye on the finish line!
Hang in there.

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