Friday, November 03, 2006

6w1d Heartbeats and Nausea

I went for 6 week scan today and we saw two little fluttery heartbeats. Here is a 3D scan of Batman and Robin in their gestational sacs. Each about the size of a lentil! They each also have a "yolk sac" attached, though superhero uniforms do not yet seem to be present.



One of them is measuring at 6w4d (CRL=.61cm; GS=2.26) and the other at 6w5d (CRL=.54cm; GS=2.45).

Quite crazy indeed! Additional good news is that my RE wants to continue to follow me closely until 12 weeks. I am so grateful to not be let go right away. I also have made an initial appointment with an OB recommended by my RE (who has experience with IVF pregnancies, twins, high risk, etc.) 2 weeks from now.

I am also scheduled for CVS with one of the most highly regarded guys in the country for this procedure. Will do this test at 11 1/2 weeks because I have to wait until at least 11 weeks with twins.

So far so good and the best news of all this week is I AM ALLOWED TO RESUME EXERCISE because the placental separation I had has resolved. I am so grateful. I don't do very well without exercise. I really hope I never have to be on long bed rest. No jinx, no jinx.

Mentally. Wow. It's been really intense. I should have been expecting this, as I've read it in so many peoples' blogs... IF'ers don't just turn off the stress and uncertainty and all of a sudden turn into those people who feel unabandoned happiness. I am happy very deep inside, and I know I'm lucky so far and I am extremely grateful every day. But I am going to tell the truth here: I am quite shocked and sometimes downright scared shitless about twins. I had issues BEFORE about how having one kid might change my life in ways that I might not love, but now it's magnified.

Sometimes I feel completely overwhelmed, and last week I was very clearly depressed. The hormones are pumping. This week I'm feeling a bit different. A little calmer, a little less shell-shocked. I am trying to give myself permission to take time to let it sink in, to go day by day and grow with whatever grows within me. I am experimenting with a new paradigm right now: I will walk willingly through this gate of change and be changed by the experience. If this pregnancy (oh my god I wrote it!) carries on, I will be changed, my life will change. Grasping on to who I was with terror of losing the "before" is not only futile, it's irrelevant. I want to be excited and optimistic about this adventure. I have glimpses of it. But I'm not there yet.

Complicating the mental challenges is the fact that I'm feeling pretty sick. Food sucks. I hate food. I must eat it, however, and I do feel a lot better when I have chomped down some grub, but I am averted to everything. I have not yet yacked, and am remaining hopeful that it stays like this and doesn't get too much worse. The morning sickness was detectable at 4.5 weeks but really kicked in at 5.5 weeks.

What a friggin' trip this is. Any tips and assvice appreciated. And I am reading you. Fingers crossed for all the Oct/Nov cycle Sistas.

16 comments:

Lut C. said...

A sight for sore eyes!

Of course having twins is scary, and it takes some time to wrap your head around. Fortunately, you still have time.

Mary Ellen and Steve said...

Congratulations!! I am so glad that your ultrasound went well.

PortLairge said...

Many Congratulations. You must be seeing Dr Phillips for your CVS. My OB described him as the second best in tghe world and the best in USA at this procedure. I went to him and he was wonderful. The whole procedure was like a PAP smear. You are in good hands. Good luck with your pregnancy.

Thalia said...

Totally fantastic news, Utrus, I'm so pleased for you. And how amazing to have 3d pictures so early!

Kris said...

That is so freaking exciting about those two little flutters that I can hardly stand it!

Rachel said...

I am just so excited for you. I don't even have words.

soralis said...

Congrats... love the photos. Good luck with the m/s! Twins can be very overwhelming, but my husband and I made it through with no help so if I can do it you shouldn't have any trouble at all!

Wishing you all the best

Take care

Anonymous said...

For m/s I reccomend Zofran. It doesn't make food sound or taste better but it does help you keep it down.
Congratulations on B&R! Overwhelmed is par for the course. Good luck!

fisher queen said...

Congrats! The only advice I have for the stress and fear is to try to lean on and trust the other people in your life. I have really had to rely on Hub much more than I ever did, it's been a good lesson.

M said...

Congratulations! It's natural to be nervous and cautious about being too excited. I'm not sure fertiles will ever quite understand why we remain so guarded.

Debbi said...

WoW... congratulations! Another hurdle is behind you and you're going full steam ahead. Try to take a moment here and there to enjoy :-)

Lisa said...

Wowza! I'm just so happy for you!

Just another Jenny said...

I wish I had some assvice. All that I can say regarding the nausea is that it is totally normal to hate food. Eat only what you like/want to. You don't need to worry about eating alot until the 2nd trimester (in which your appetite will double and you'll love all food).

Gorgeous ultrasound pic. I'm so happy for you!

Mellie said...

Mazel Tov! I'm so thrilled for you! Wishing you an easy and healthy pregnancy. I know it's crazy to think that you might actually end up with real live infants at the end - but it looks likely! Try your best to keep enjoying this time.

Tina said...

congratulations on your pregnancy! Just happen to stumble on your page. I myself has been suffering from IF and I know how frustrating it can be. I have PCOS and to add to this, DH has low sperm count and we have an immunological problem (DH and I are too the same they say which makes my body reject the embryo). Had lots of IUIs and 1 failed IVF, I had a miscarriage too last year. Got pregnant again with Clomid and IUI but I'm stressed to death but feeling hopeful.

Just like hearing people with IF getting pregnant.

Have a H&H 9 months.

Amy said...

Congrats! I'm so excited for you. The ultrasound photos look great!